We’ve all heard the news – Arlovski and Fedor will headline the next Affliction card October 11th in Las Vegas. Leaving the Honda Center after Affliction Banned! I had suggested the Arlovski/Fedor matchup might be a logical next feature bout. Two simple reasons: Randy Couture caught up in contract dispute with the UFC and Arlovski looked that good at Banned!

So with the fight less than three months away I thought I would reach out to Andrei through MMAtraining.com and give him the recipe to success against Fedor in five easy steps. Admittedly they are unconventional but when you are up against someone who is 28-1 you have to do whatever it takes. There comes a time in everyone’s life where the tried and true methods need a review as the task at hand is that daunting.

Andrei, here are the keys to the Fedor castle:

1. Magic Fuji Dust


Remember Mr. Fuji? If you don’t or if he wasn’t legendary in Belarus as he was mid 1980’s North America, look him up. He was a wrestling manager in what was then called the WWF. When his student was losing the match he would find a way to reach into his bag of tricks and toss magic fuji dust into the opponent’s eyes. Temporarily blinded, Fuji’s protege would quickly pin his opponent and win the match. Reach out to Fuji, maybe he has some ideas for Fedor.

2. The “peepee”

Your interview where you referenced Tim Sylvia enjoying the taste of your big peepee is legendary and without question had Tim distracted for the 30 or so seconds he lasted with Fedor. Find a way to use that same mind game on Fedor.

3. Location

While the venue is currently slated for Vegas, see if last minute you can get it moved to some remote gym in Minsk, Belarus. Chances are Fedor won’t be able to find it and you’re golden. Winner, no contest, Andre Arlovski!

4. Fangs

Replace the fangs in your mouth guard with actual nails. At some point, use them.

5. Give it everything you’ve got

Make it the fight of your life. Bring the intensity you did to Banned! With your power, fitness, technical skills and competitiveness, you’ve got as good a chance as anyone in the field today to pull off the upset.

I’m looking forward to the fight and no doubt Fedor will be favored but after watching Arlovski at Banned! I think we’re in for a real battle this time.